Oh, this is really interesting and moving; thank you for laying it all out in English. (In some ways good writing advice as well as living advice?)
"Could it be that you aren't afraid of your insufficiency, but rather you are afraid to let out all that is good and beautiful within you?"
This brings to mind Etty Hillesum's diary for me for some reason--I'll have to go back and see if there's a specific passage that echoes this...