Ab Hinc

[extrapenguin]

On AO3
Summary: Ghem-General Dag Benin, Chief of Celestial Security, does not approve of (some of) his new underlings.
(The Bujold Fest is here!)

It is a Barrayaran truism that all Cetagandans are evil, some just in different ways than others.

 

Ghem-General Dag Benin, recently given the office of Chief of Celestial Security, allowed himself a whole ten seconds of staring at his inbox in despair. To his mental to-do list he added a note on acquiring a secretary from somewhere.

His ten seconds up, he opened the first item. Experiment #134983 “Stuffed Pineapple” has escaped and seeks to bring down the Empire. How incompetent did one have to be to make all of the genetics lab's creations hate everything one stood for? Dag sighed and made a mental note.

 

Half an hour later, Dag had tamed a full half of his unread messages – as much as he could read without forgetting some of his mental notes – and went to solve the Empire's problems, humming one of Vrach's more complex pieces as he walked down the corridors.

 

The door opened with perfect timing. A few moments later, and Dag would've started the motions of knocking, embarrassing himself.

“Good afternoon, ghem-General”, the haut Pel said. “Do sit.”

“Good afternoon, honored haut”, Dag said, gave a measured bow, and sat on the indicated chair.

The antechamber they were in was done in a warm gray with brown accents. The door to Pel's sanctum was open behind her bubble, gleaming blueish white.

“What brings you here?” Pel asked. Her ladybubble harmonized perfectly with the antechamber's décor, switching between two shades of pink in a rhythm Dag recognized from the Vrach piece he'd been humming.

“The Department of Genetic Warfare seems to have had some difficulties lately”, he began.

Pel snorted. “You do seem to have a gift for understatement. Have they ever produced anything that was not fueled by an all-consuming desire to watch the Cetagandan Empire burn?”

“I suppose they occasionally produce corpses, honored haut. And I doubt the plants they produced for operation “Missing Socks” were fueled by anything beyond carbon dioxide and sunlight.”

“Ah yes. Now, why did you come to me?” Pel asked.

Dag gave the smallest hint of a smile. “I do feel that the Department of Genetic Warfare is in a minor spot of trouble. Are they not ghem, tinkering with things nearly human? I believe that having a haut-lady supervisor would help with the moral permissability of such business. I humbly suggest that adding haut-ladies of appropriate rank to their cadre of geneticists and supervisors would curb most of their troubles.”

Pel was silent for a moment, in a way that signified that she'd cut off sound output from her bubble. “I like your style, ghem-General”, she finally said, predatory smile clear in her voice. “ Would you be interested in accompanying me on my investigative visit to the Department of Genetic Warfare tomorrow? I do feel that a ghemish guide would help me not overlook anything crucial.”

“I shall accompany you tomorrow”, Dag said. He rose and bowed. “Good day, honored haut.”

“Good day, ghem-General”, Pel said, then went silent.

Dag, possessing more self-control, didn't laugh evilly until he was in his own office.