First lines meme
11 Aug 2013 18:13![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
extrapenguinFirst lines of the ten last fics I wrote, (order of descending recentness; newest at the top) then commentary.
Feel free to ask for DVD commentary on anything I've written in the comments.
1. Denis wondered when he'd be executed.
2. Barrayarans don't do any of that inferior “voting” activity; they sensibly have an Emperor.
3. “...and what if she decides to run away?” his Emperor said in growing terror, continuing to pace. “I'd never find anyone to marry!”
4. “You should've just accepted your fate. Then I wouldn't have to be here, pointing a gun at your head.”
5. You don't dream anymore. To dream would be to think that things could change.
6. “Sire, you are doing it all wrong!” Old General Piotr bellowed to Gregor from the other end of the riding arena.
7. Homework: Describe the current political situation in Vorbarr Sultana.
8. Heron was a rather good horse: a number of minor conformational faults that established why he wasn't a stallion and brought down his price to something affordable, a decent enough training, and a good head.
9. My children, they shall rule all worlds
10. I serve my nation of Haven
Now, 7, 9, and 10 are poetry; I'll analyze them seperately someday. (Anyone want to analyze my poetry?)
Three lines are dialogue, two are description and two are thoughts. One is written in second person (it was an interesting experiment), the others are all tight third person.
8 is probably the worst of the lot, even if it does establish the "horses!" theme in the fic. If I had to pic a favorite, it'd have to be 4, with 1 also being good. I think I've been improving with my writing (I hope so).
Think I'm the worst analyzer in the history of analysis? Drop a comment! Drop a comment anyway!
Feel free to ask for DVD commentary on anything I've written in the comments.
1. Denis wondered when he'd be executed.
2. Barrayarans don't do any of that inferior “voting” activity; they sensibly have an Emperor.
3. “...and what if she decides to run away?” his Emperor said in growing terror, continuing to pace. “I'd never find anyone to marry!”
4. “You should've just accepted your fate. Then I wouldn't have to be here, pointing a gun at your head.”
5. You don't dream anymore. To dream would be to think that things could change.
6. “Sire, you are doing it all wrong!” Old General Piotr bellowed to Gregor from the other end of the riding arena.
7. Homework: Describe the current political situation in Vorbarr Sultana.
8. Heron was a rather good horse: a number of minor conformational faults that established why he wasn't a stallion and brought down his price to something affordable, a decent enough training, and a good head.
9. My children, they shall rule all worlds
10. I serve my nation of Haven
Now, 7, 9, and 10 are poetry; I'll analyze them seperately someday. (Anyone want to analyze my poetry?)
Three lines are dialogue, two are description and two are thoughts. One is written in second person (it was an interesting experiment), the others are all tight third person.
8 is probably the worst of the lot, even if it does establish the "horses!" theme in the fic. If I had to pic a favorite, it'd have to be 4, with 1 also being good. I think I've been improving with my writing (I hope so).
Think I'm the worst analyzer in the history of analysis? Drop a comment! Drop a comment anyway!